All Settled Down

We were involved in an accident in May 2007. It wasn't our fault and we sustained a fair bit of damage (and in my case, minor injuries), so we sued. It's all been finally settled and we should be getting the proceeds in a couple of weeks. Not loads of money, but enough to buy us a new bed. We'll be Tempurpedic shopping by the end of the month....

A Pagan's Progress

I was raised a Southern Baptist. I went to Catholic school for 1st grade. Since I was about 12 years old, I have considered myself a pagan. That's actually a misnomer; I didn't know what a pagan was when I was 12, but I knew that worshiping an old man wrapped in a sheet sitting on a cloud did not resonate with me.
I always hated going to church, because I felt out of place and bored, not to mention that my clothes weren't as nice as my Sunday School classmates' and they took special care to bring that up. My grandmother told me that I would get things that I prayed for, but that never seemed to happen. I didn't pray for stuff like bicycles or toys; I prayed that I would not be molested anymore and that my father would realize that it was a mistake to leave me and my mother and he would come back and pay attention to me. It never happened and my anger and resentment grew.
The only time I felt at peace was when I went to my grandparents' farm and sneaked out of the house at night. I would climb over the fence and lay on the hard, grazed over ground in the pasture next to the house, staring up at the stars. That was church for me.

I started reading about paganism about 20 years ago. The word "pagan" means peasant or rural dweller, or someone who follows a polytheistic belief system and feels a connection to Nature. It's not nice to fool Mother Nature, as we all know. It's always made more sense to me to believe in a feminine Deity, but now I know that there has to be a male counterpart for life to begin. Since I don't have children (nor plans for any) this might seem like a contradiction, but while I believe that procreation must take place for Nature to continue, I don't think that it pertains to every human on the planet. It makes more sense to me to make the world a better place for the children who are already here, not make more that we are ill-equipped to take care of in the first place. Death should be just as important as life and concentrated meditation (or praying or casting spells) can be a valued part of life.
I also like the ancient idea of the "wise woman" or crone. I want to be one of those weird old ladies (or witch, if you like) that people go to when they need advice or remedies for their situation. I feel like I actually may have been one in a previous life. I've never understood the infatuation with youth in this culture; why not venerate old people who have life experience and a knowledge of history?

My husband is an atheist and I myself went through a long agnostic period, mainly because I didn't realize that there was an alternative to believing in the Christian god, except not believing in anything and I knew that wasn't right for me. I'm sure he'll be appalled to read this, since I tend to keep my beliefs quiet. He's incredulous that I like to watch "Ghost Hunters" and I actually believe in an afterlife. I don't question his ideas and he doesn't question mine. I have a wonderful atheist husband and wonderful Christian relatives and friends whom I love dearly. Whatever gets you through the night is all right, as John Lennon said.

Migraines are not cost effective

I called in sick today because I went to bed and woke up with a screaming migraine that was causing my left eye to swell shut. I didn't have migraines for most of the summer, because summer in Texas is usually just one thing: HOT. When the season changes to spring and fall, they kick up again because of the change in barometric pressure. Hurricane Ike is making landfall tonight, so I should have realized that a headache was in the cards.

It's hard to describe what a migraine is like; the only comparison I can make would be someone plunging a bayonet through your temple and punching you in the eye at the same time. I've had them most of my life and can usually deal with them fine. I have meds for them, I just don't keep them filled because they're very expensive and the pharmacy will only give you 6 tablets, which for me will take care of 1 headache. I should have filled the prescription 2 days ago anyway, when I got an aura. For those of you unfamiliar, auras are little flashes of light on you peripheral vision or a disturbance in the visual field. Mine make everything look like it's outlined in neon glitter. Everything gets shiny to the point where I sometimes can't see anything for a few minutes and I have to go to the ladies room and cover my eyes for a while. I spent most of the day today in bed and I'll probably do that most of tomorrow too, until the winds die down.

Coot Humor

Hey thar, little gal! You're lookin' mighty sweet in your torn britches and your blue hair. Wanna see my Pride & Joy?

I like your nose rings too. Ya like my 3 carrot ring?

What say you and me go get us a hamburger sandwich and a malted milkshake? Let's court, you cute lil' heifer!